Tuesday, October 25, 2005

The 40 Year-Old Virgin


I left work early today to go see a movie. I like to see a movie at the movie house on Tuesday because it is Budget Price Tuesday. These days I pay eight bucks to see a movie when every other day of the week it is fifteen bucks fifty. Does $15.50 sound like a lot of money to pay to see a movie to you? It does to me. I have never paid $15.50 to see a movie and can't see it ever happening. It's funny because I'm not a person who is obsessed with getting a bargain price on everything. I don't listen to somebody tell me they bought some pants for fifty bucks and laugh and say well my pants were on special they only cost twenty bucks. I don't live my life worrying about that stuff. I like to throw the money around if I got it. Who cares. It's only money. Oh yeah, you say, only money. It's only money when you got it hey, but when you ain't got it, it ain't only money. You got a point there, I'll admit it. But I didn't always have money. I've had my share of nights eating chilli sauce on toast and it wasn't fun that's for sure. But this is going off the track a bit. What I was going to say was that even though I am not obsessed with getting a bargain for every damn thing, I will only go and see a movie on Bargain Price Tuesday. Maybe it is an obsession.
Anyway, the movie I went and saw was called The 40 Year-Old Virgin.
When I walked into the theatre and found a seat in a perfect position, right in the middle with my eyes about level with the vertical middle of the screen, I sat down with my vanilla choc-top. I used to always buy the coffee choc-tops but since that episode with the collapsing cone I have been getting vanilla choc-tops. I think what it was was that not many people buy those coffee choc-tops so they get old there in the freezer and the cone loses its structural integrity. I seem to be terrified now of buying another coffee choc-top to find the damn cone all floppy.
Well, I sat down with my vanilla choc-top and a funny thing happened. I heard people giggling all over the place. I thought yes for sure I am about to see a comedy movie, everybody is already giggling like schoolgirls and the movie hasn't even begun yet. These were obviously hardcore comedy fans, people who laugh all the time about God knows what, but everything is funny. I got a big smile. I thought it was pretty funny myself, this crowd. They were all laughing at God knows what, but it seemed to be funny as hell. Maybe they had heard about my coffee choc-top phobia.
Oh yeah, the movie. I guess anybody who was reading this for the movie review is long gone, so here it is for my hardcore readers. God bless you!
The movie is about a guy called Andy (Steve Carell who I saw recently in another funny movie called The Anchorman) and he is 40 years old and has never had sex with a woman. Most people probably have sex by the time they are 13 these days so Andy's case must seem pretty bizarre to most people. Andy works in an electronics store, like a Dick Smith Powerhouse here in Australia. He lives by himself and collects action figures that he never removes from the box, plus he reads comics. Not only all that, but he also rides a bicycle to work! Yes, he lives in Los Angeles (it must be Los Angeles because every American movie is made in LA) where if you don't have a car you are a bum or a nerdy bicycle rider like Andy.
When the other guys at work find they are a man short for a poker game they reluctantly ask him if he wants to join them. During the poker game they are all telling stories about sex experiences when it gets around to Andy's turn. The more he says, the more the other guys stare in amazement at the nutty things he is saying. Then he compares a woman's boobs to bags of sand, so that's when they know he is still a virgin. So they take it on themselves to get Andy laid.
I'm about to pass out so I'll wrap this up as fast as I can. This movie was very good. The cast was excellent, every one. It was very funny and even though there were gross-out gags - like Andy getting up every morning with a boner, then one morning sitting down to take a dump sits down with that boner and starts pissing up into his own face - the movie had a lot of heart, to put it in a corny way. All the characters were very likeable and funny. There were a lot of big laughs in the movie, it was very funny. It was so good that I am looking forward to seeing it again. I could watch it again next week and be excited about seeing it again.
It was a good movie, and very funny.

3 comments:

D3HUM8N1Z3R said...

15.50 bucks for a movie? Jeez! In Belgium it's about 7 euro for one movie. I have a subscription that allows me to see movies unlimited for 14.90 euro a month. They should offer subscriptions more often in other moviehouses as well. It would be very profitable for them.

J C said...

Your commentary was more interesting at the beginning of your post than the movie sounds.

I have Dish Satellite Network and get that same movie in the regular course of movie events on TV. I didn't watch it; it didn't look very interesting.
I used to go to movies but, after one time (about 20 years ago) my wife and I went to a movie and sat in the center of an XXX rated audience, we decided to see the movies when they come on TV a couple of weeks later.

When I was a kid, I could ride the bus to town, buy a ticket to the Strand Theater that was showing 7 comedies and three features and a serial-(usually the Iron Claw or Buck Rogers), (from 9:00 AM until 2:00 PM) buy a bag of popcorn,watch the movie and ride the bus back home for a quarter.

Patt said...

In Scotland any time you we'r at a party when you were small invariably a drunk older uncle would tell you." when i was wee we used to get into the pictures for an old jam jar and get change back for a bag of chips "..I was even at a newyears party many years ago when my frineds drunk neibourgh said he got a suit for a jam jar.This is either a lot of pish or a very poor quality suit.This leads me to believe one of two things either the old guys are liars or just streching the truth a bit or jam must have cost a fortune in the old days.You say $15.50 to get into the pictures if the jar was worth that in todays prices that makes jam about $40 a jar.