Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Robots


There was a comical scene at work today. The morning flew by, speeding up fast to midday, which would be my cue to get the hell out of there because Hallelujah! I had a half day today! Anyway, midday rolled around and my COLLEAGUE said to boss, 'Boss, is it OK if I go out for lunch?' She never goes out for lunch, she always eats at her desk. Boss said yeah, sure. Then I walks up and says, "Well, see ya, boss. I'm off, too!' 'When will you be back?' she says. Boss hates being in the office alone because someone might come in and ask her to book a courier. She HATES having to book couriers. I look at her and says, 'I ain't coming back. Got me a half day!' She forgot all about it, you see, even though I made sure it was OK with her last week, and even reminded her yesterday just before I left for the day. She spluttered, going, 'Buh buh buh buh...' then started saying 'You know you have to check with ME first...' but I cut in and I says, "I checked with you about it last week. You said it was cool and you were gonna write it in your calender thing on your computer. Plus I reminded you yesterday, remember?' She backpeddled pretty fast, like one of those guys on a unicycle. I flew out the door just as fast, like I had never been there at all.
Ah, Tuesday afternoon! BUDGET TUESDAY at the movies! I wanted to see Assault on Precinct 13 but the next session was hours away. What dumb programming! I'll have to have a word with these idiots.
My second choice was Robots so I saw that.
Let me get this out of the way: the movie looked great, the animation was excellent, there was some very funny moments and some STUNNING scenes, like the one where Rodney and Fender are transported through Robot City inside a metal cage-type vehicle, along rails, blasted from spring-loaded catapults, at tremendous velocity and in a spectacular, stomach-churning manner. There was also one of those domino scenes like you will see at the end of the TV news about once a year, where there are a million dominoes set up in strange patterns, over an enormous area, and it has taken an army weeks to set it up but it all goes down in two minutes.
The movie is worth seeing for these two scenes alone.
Now for the negative, here it is. Some goddam idiot who had some influence on the making of this movie thought it would be FUNNY to include such things as making one of the robots do that stupid move, I've seen it, you probably have, too. I've seen it in different places, and even in real life I saw some goddam fool do it. I understand it is from the Rikki Lake Show because while the person does it, they are chanting "GO RIKKI! GO RIKKI!" And there is a ridiculous body movement that goes along with it. You know it, don't you! You have seen it too! Well, in this movie they make one of the robots do it! Who decided that this would be FUNNY or a GOOD IDEA for something a robot should do? Huh? HUH?!
AND! Not only that but there was another scene where, to my HORROR, a Britney Spears song started up and they made the robot dance to the Britney Spears song!! Was THAT a good idea? For a robot to do that? Who thought it would be a good idea? Somebody who had something to do with the making of this movie must have, at some point, come up with these stupid ideas, and either convinced, or more likely FORCED, the other people to use these goddam annoying and retarded and NOT FUNNY or AMUSING ideas. These kind of stupid ideas can RUIN a movie! It almost ruined this one! For me! Yes, for me it almost ruined my enjoyment of the movie!
O how I wish I could have the person responsible for this kind of ATROCITY identified and brought before me! My sick imagination will soar and exceed itself! The torture will be SPECTACULAR and ENDLESS! And included as one of the SPECIAL FEATURES on the DVD!

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