Friday, July 29, 2005

Half Life

Thank God Almighty it's Friday night and the week of work is finished. Now what? I have two days to do whatever I please. I can sleep in two mornings. Can do whatever I want for two days and not have to worry about going to work. I can do whatever I want on my two days off, but what difference does it make? I'll be back at work on Monday and get through the week and another weekend is there to do something with for a short time before work starts again. The same thing over and over again. Get through another week and then two more lousy days off to pass the time before going back to work. Sometimes I get the feeling there is more somewhere, but it's just out of reach. I feel like I'm flopping around on the ground like a fish, gulping stupidly for air, not really for air but for something, I don't know what, but SOMETHING. What is life anyway? Is this life? Am I alive? Of course I am, but it seems to be a kind of half life. I see people on TV and they seem to have a life much different to my kind of *life*. What is their secret? Their eyes are white, bright. Well, many of them seem to be idiots, so I guess that's some consolation. But I look in the mirror and my eyes are barely open, and bloodshot.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

The old saying goes, "Welcome to the real world."
Do you realize that the very next thing you do will be the most important thing in the world? It doesn't even matter what it is. It can be some little thing that maybe no one else will ever know about except you but that thing, whatever it is, has never been done before and will never be done again and, of course, never by anyone else in the world. What a wonderful feat you will accomplish whenever you do that thing, whatever it is!

Right now I am going to mow (with a weed-eater) the 10X4 foot lawn so Chico the Wonder Dog can get his leg up far enough over the grass to do his watering job. And I am really looking forward to it!

Now, have a great weekend! Jim

sandy said...

Of course the people you see onTV are white eyed and bright. That's what their script tells them to be.
Reading your blog makes me enjoy retirement a whole lot more. I get up when I want most days. Everyday is a week end for me. "Rubbing In, Rubbing In"

Stratu said...

anonymous Jim: The very next thing I did after reading your inspirational comment was to go and grab a beer from the fridge. You know what? You were right! (Although I have a vague feeling that this action may have been performed before by someone, somewhere, at some time in history...)
Sandy: Thanks for reminding me that there are folks like yourself who have done their time and no longer need to get up and head for the coal face. I am reminded of Sean Connery's line in The Untouchables, right after he whacks the guy in the guts in the illegal booze warehouse: "Do you think he feels better now? Or worse?"