Sunday, March 20, 2005

Are You Having Fun?

I didn't write anything here last night because I worked at another rave party selling glo-stix and t-shirts and CDs. This one was at the same place as the other ones I worked at recently (at the skate centre in Penrith.)
This time we couldn't get a lift out there so I had to hire a car, it was silver, a Hyundai Getz. Is it named after the jazz dude Stan Getz? Who cares.
There were twice as many kids at the party as last time so we were selling glow products at a frantic pace, but we are professionals, it was no problem.
One of the dudes there who I talk to sometimes told me that he had started up kickboxing again, so I told him I'd bet he had seen Ong Bak, and he replied sure he had, so we talked about how excellent it was, and what a sensation Tony Jaa is. I asked him if he got black eyes and bruises and stuff from kickboxing and he said sure.
A girl came up and asked me the question I dread, or one of them. Not one of these nights passes without somebody asking me. They all want to know: Are you having fun? Do I look like I am having fun? If I look like I am having fun, then I probably am. If I don't look like I am having fun, then I am probably not. One minute I may be having fun, the next minute not, so if you look at me that next minute you may assume I am not having fun, whereas a moment ago I WAS having fun. Also, maybe I am not having fun but I tell you I AM having fun, because I feel compelled to answer in the positive. Anyway, do you really care if I am having fun? Does it matter to you? Do you care about me? Do you have a boyfriend? You see now, it is not an easy question to answer. Do you have time to listen to me as I explain how I can have fun and not have fun? No you don't because you must report to the dancefloor. It is impossible to be having fun all the time, and thankfully impossible to be miserable all the time. If I say yes I am having fun, I will feel like an idiot. It is a complicated business, no doubt about it.
Please excuse me, I have not slept. Now I am also hallucinating. I don't feel so hot, to be honest.
I am not having fun.

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